No, I'd better go. I'm getting the *fear*! Miss Blennerhassett, telephone the police. Withnail: Nonsense, this is a far superior drink to meths! Throwing themselves into the road gladly to escape all this hideousness! Withnail: (Ranting on a mountain) Bastards! Monty: Listen, you young prat. Danny: You hold it down, I'll strangle it. We are not drunks, we are multi-millionaires! the web and also on Android and iOS. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Marwood: No you can't, listen to me, listen to me! [voiceover] Uncle Monty: Get that damned little swine out of here! Then you get horribly drunk and they can't fucking touch you. Withnail: Then the f***er will rue the day! Withnail: I'm a trained actor reduced to the status of a bum. You lose, you gain. These are the sort of windows faces look in at! All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Cooking's one of the natural instincts. And I'm sitting in this bloody shack and I can't cope with Withnail. Marwood: Then they must be delighted with your career. We live in a land of weather forecasts and breakfasts that set in, shat on by Tories, shovelled up by Labour, and here we are, we three; perhaps the last island of beauty in the world. quotes military heroes famous quotesgram. It's trying to get itself in with you. Here it is: Movie Drone: I Heart - Withnail And I moviedroneblog.blogspot.com. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Monty: Withnail: Marwood: (Voice-over) Speed is like a dozen transatlantic flights without ever getting off the plane. I happen to be the proprietor. move forward or backward to get to the perfect spot. We've got to get some booze. This most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave oerhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire, why, it appeareth nothing to me but a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours. Withnail: If I hear more words out of you, I'll put one of these here black pods on you. Withnail & I Quotes. QuotesGram Marwood: Monty: He is even taller than Withnail and much more burly. They can handle the caftan but they cannot handle the bell. And soon, I suppose, I shall be swept away by some vulgar little tumour. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Uncle Monty: Sherry? Making an enemy of our own future. Got a randy bull up there. When that moment comes, one's ambition ceases. This huge, thatched head with its earlobes and cannonball is now considered sane. Marwood: [clearly drunk] Monty: Danny: Withnail and I - Wikiquote Raymond Duck. Marwood: Get any more masculine than him and you'd have to live up a tree. Withnail: There is a certain je ne sais quoi - oh, so very special - about a firm, young carrotExcuse me Uncle Monty: I mean to have you, even if it must be burglary! He slams it shut and slumps against it, shaken, a few minutes later, Withnail re-enters the cottage holding a wet stick, Withnail sees Marwood eating some brownish fluid out of a bowl with a spoon, Monty's Rolls-Royce pulls up outside the window, looking at the kitchen sink overflowing with dirty dishes, he picks up the kettle on the stove. Withnail: You mustn't blame him. These aren't accidents, they're throwing themselves into the road! [Danny offers Withnail his huge Camberwell Carrot spliff] Peter Marwood (I): Even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day. Sherry? Monty: (to the cat) you beastly little parasite how dare you, you little thug how dare you, arrgh beastly ungrateful little swine. [voiceover] He's so mauve, we don't know what he's planning! Danny: Withnail: Marwood: [noticing the plastic bags that Withnail is wearing over his shoes] And if I spike you, you'll know you've been spoken to. Man delights not me. I'm a trained actor reduced to the status of a bum! It's too hot so he drops it]. St Peter preached the epistles to the apostles looking like that. Withnail: Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E04 High Diving Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection V.2 - S01E11 Tortoise Beats Hare, [SINGING] Hare Krishna, Hare Lama Hare Krishna, Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E08 Water, Water Every Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E37 Frigid Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection V.2 - S01E13 Slick Hare. I'm not having this shag sack insulting me! I think the carrot infinitely more fascinating than the geranium. No fridges, no televisions, no phones. Withnail & I - The Script - Tripod Hello? Will we never be set free? Withnail: My brain's capsizing. You just wait. Marwood: What is all this "tactical necessity" and "calculated risk?!" Withnail: No you won't, you're not leaving me in here alone. His head must weight fifty pounds on its own. Director: Bruce Robinson Stars: Richard E. Grant, Paul McGann, Richard Griffiths Rating: Unrated Runtime: 107 minutes Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). Withnail: I need at least an hour for lunch. Withnail: Good old Jake. Uncle Monty: It is the most shattering experience of a young man's life when one morning he awakes and quite reasonably says to himself, "I will never play the Dane.". He winces as he stretches his leg]. share. Marwood: You never discuss your family, do you? Hurry up, Mabs. Here grows the plant Assidos, which, when worn by any one, protects him from the evil spirit, forcing it to state its business and name; consequently the foul spirits keep out of the way there. Withnail And I - Wikipedia en.m.wikipedia.org. Oh, but how dreadful. Cunt gave him two years. Withnail: Ive told you why. The greatest decade in the history of mankind is over. The carrot has mystery. [screwing his eyes shut in terror, moaning] [Withnail sees Marwood eating some brownish fluid out of a bowl with a spoon] But sooner or later you've got to get out because it's crashing. It is a bond filled with trust, unconditional love, understanding, and support. [a few minutes later, Withnail re-enters the cottage holding a wet stick]. Don't threaten me with a dead fish! Marwood: I have just narrowly avoided having a buggering. Withnail: Saint Peter preached the epistles to the apostles looking like that. Withnail: You undo your valve and give them a dose of unadulterated child's piss and they have to give you your keys back. Withnail hands Marwood the bag of shopping and jumps over the wall to safety. His mechanism's gone, he's had more drugs than you've had hot dinners! The greatest decade in the history of mankind is over. This is a British cult classic. It's wearing a yellow sock. I couldn't, I'm spaced. Danny: I think a drink, don't you? I think we better release you from the lgume, and transfer your talents to the meat. Find the exact Withnail: save. A pair of quadruple whiskies and another pair of pints, please. Withnail: [reading from the paper] "In a world exclusive interview, 33-year-old shotputter Geoff Woade, who weighs 317 pounds, admitted taking massive doses of anabolic steroids, drugs banned in sport. Withnail: I feel like a pig shat in my head. Marwood: How like a *god*! Well, of course you don't, you are incapable of indulging in anything but pleasure, am I not right? Withnail is cowering under the covers]. Screaming like a madman he moves towards the bull, which turns around and runs back through the gate. I don't know what's in here. We may as well sit round this cigarette. Sod your pheasants! [Marwood comes out of the bathroom wearing a towel]. Withnail: Talk. The meaning dawns on him. Oh dear, no, no, no, I'd be sucked into his trap. The "I must sleep with you because I've been scared" - convenient isn't it, when you're both half or . reading, studying, and reflecting this history have led to this moment. What had I done to offend him? Withnail : Right, you fucker, I'm going to do the washing up! Withnail: Would it be in bad form to plagiarise a toast? Marwood: One of my favourite movies. Change down, man. I think you've been punished enough. I've no idea. [amorously puts his hand on Marwood's arm as he peels vegetables] It's ridiculous. Cake. Amy Audrey Locke's 1912 In Praise of Winchester offers an anthology of over 100 pages of prose and verse about Winchester College. Withnail: I've got a bastard behind the eyes. Here. Sitting down to enjoy my holiday. Listen to this. And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? I've been to drama school. Look at this - accident blackspot? That's worse than meths! St Peter preached the epistles to the apostles looking like that. Listen, I think you should strangle it instantly in case it starts trying to make friends with us. Well neither have I. Withnail: Weve gone on holiday by mistake. You haven't slept in sixty hours, you're in no state to tackle it. Burnt! Withnail: How should I possibly know what we should do? Danny: Don't get uptight with me, man. [Withnail laughs uncontrollably and drops to the floor]. [a poacher enters the pub with pheasants stuffed under his coat, making him look like a hunchback]. I'm preparing myself to forgive you. "I fuck arses." Withnail: Withnail: I'm in a park and I'm practically dead; what good's the countryside? Withnail: Withnail: For all of us, quotes are a great way to remember a book and to carry with us the author's best ideas. It's a part I intend to play, Uncle. I can never touch meat until it's cooked. Hello? Plot - Withnail and "I" - the narrator - are two aspiring actors and friends who are looking for a job in London without success. A cat, rain, Vim under the sink, and both bars on. Will it? Whats more popular than the movie itselfis, its amazing quotes. Much more of this and I'm going to apply for meals on wheels. Imagine the size of his balls. It's horrible really but they like that, the little girls. Sort: Relevant Newest # withnail and i # withnail and i # game of thrones cast # drunks # multimillionaires # gotcha # dave chappelle # i will # gotcha bitch The fuel and wood situation. My thumbs have gone weird! Withnail: Look at Geoff Woade! I sense there is world play but I just don't get it. I can't take aspirins without a drink. Hairs are your aerials. This is a far superior drink to meths. My brain's capsizing, I've gotta unfuck my brain! It's you he wants. It was like walking into a lung. Those are the kind of windows faces look in at. Probably wintering with his mother in Guildford. We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here and we want them now! Withnail and I is a TV program that first aired in 1970 . grant . They are flat broke, so they move to the house of Withnail's uncle in the countryside. It's society's crime, not ours. Yeah, I know, but I got the logs in. I'm a friend of Montague Withnail's. We live in a land of weather forecasts and breakfasts that set in. Where's the aspirins? Even a stopped clock gives the right time twice a day And for once I'm inclined to believe that Withnail is right We are indeed, drifting into the arena of the unwell making an enemy of our own future What we need is harmony, fresh air, stuff like that. Monty: Jake: [he throws the shopping the air and it scatters in the mud. I'm gonna be a sta-a-a-a-ar! Why don't you wash up occasionally like any other human being? Marwood: No, no, no, dear boy, you must leave, you must leave. How dare you call me inhumane?! Withnail: Look at him! [They drunkenly barge into some tearooms]. Danny: If you don't remember the sixties, don't worry - neither did they. I'm utterly arseholed. Withnail I Quotes (2 quotes) - Goodreads Marwood: Jake: Law rather appeals to me actually. Got a bit carried away. Because if you do, I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. We've gone on holiday by mistake. Peter Marwood ("I"): Stop saying that Withnail, of course he's the fucking farmer! I assure you I'm not [drunk], officer, honestly. [cheerfully hopping back over the wall] Monty: Isaac Parkin: For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. You don't deserve such loyalty. Marwood: Isaac Parkin: How come Monty owns such a horrible little shack? Withnail:I'll not have this shag sack insulting me! Withnail hands Marwood the bag of shopping and jumps over the wall to safety. [after having entirely covered himself in muscle embrocation to keep warm] Withnail: Then stick it in the soap tray and save it for later. [points a fencing sword at Marwood face] Withnail: Here.". He'd like a bit of pleading. I want something's flesh! It's like Greenland in here. Marwood: Why don't you wash up occasionally like any other human being? I've been to drama school. withnail magazinweb. I'm gonna be a star*! [pulling back the lace curtain] Withnail: I could take double anything you could! Hair are your aerials. Withnail & I Quotes hide. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Sort of said it without thinking. When they take a holiday "by mistake" at the country house of Withnail's flamboyantly gay uncle, Monty, they encounter the unpleasant side of the . And here we are, we three, perhaps the last island of beauty in the world. Withnail: Alright, we're going to have to work quickly. It's obsessed with its gut, it's like a bloody rugby ball now! Danny: All right, Miss Blennerhassett, I'm warning you, if you do, you're fired. The only programme I'm likely to get on is the f***ing news. We worked out it would be handy karma for him to get hold of a suit but he's a very low temperature spade, the Coalman. Monty: And the Coalman looks at him and says, "Do you think you look normal, Your Honour?" I would say. Half an hour? Easily I say, you know what we should do? Who f***s arses? Web. Withnail: Where is he? It's impossible, I swear it. Stand aside! Marwood: We are not drunks, we are multi-millionaires! You can never, never disguise it. [voiceover] Monty: Hello? Withnail: [whispering] I feel unusual. Cos if you do, I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. He told me about your problems. What have you done to them? Withnail: A Massachusetts man was sentenced to probation for running an illegal hare trapping operation in Maine. Why can't I have an audition? I have of late, but wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth. Tea Shop Proprietor: Withnail: Withnail: Here hare here!" Bruce Robinson, Withnail and I: the Original Screenplay. Monty: Don't you agree? You're not leaving me in here alone. How dare you! And indeed it goes so heavily with my disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory. Monty: Here hare here? And we want them here, and we want them now! What are you doing up here, then? is the clip Thanks! Having said that, I now intend to leave for London. What's in your hump? He's been fed from arsehole to beak. How like a god! Listen, Monty, there's something I have to explain to you. I tell you, I've a f*** sight more talent than half the rubbish that gets on television. Have you either of you got shoes? Bastard asked me to understudy Konstantin in The Seagull. He gags and gasps]. The beauty of the world! I've been watching you, especially you, prancing like a tit. Marwood: (Takes the shotgun) Well let me tell you something, Withnail. Suits me. Speed, is like a dozen transatlantic flights without ever getting off the plane Time change. Danny: That means we'll miss out on Monday but come up smiling Tuesday morning. Federal judge sentences Massachusetts man to probation for running We were wondering if we could possibly purchase a pheasant off of you. [to Marwood] I'd never have wanted it, not with him in it! Do you like to experience all facets of life? He winces as he stretches his leg, the drunken, elderly pub landlord opens the till and it hits it him the chest and he almost falls down, they go and sit down at a table with their drinks, fondling the money Monty has given them to buy Wellingtons, a poacher enters the pub with pheasants stuffed under his coat, making him look like a hunchback, he pulls Withnail's cigarette out of his mouth and puts it in his, after having entirely covered himself in muscle embrocation to keep warm, Withnail laughs uncontrollably and drops to the floor, Marwood comes out of the bathroom wearing a towel, Withnail has been pulled over by the police for speeding down the motorway in the beat-up Jaguar, gesturing at the wine bottles and Marwood in the back, in a telephone box, speaking to an operator, noticing the plastic bags that Withnail is wearing over his shoes, after being threatened by Jake the poacher, Danny offers Withnail his huge Camberwell Carrot spliff, Marwood is leaving to go to Manchester to do a play. Withnail: That's what you'd say, but that wouldn't wash with Geoff. Withnail: Withnail: "I'm going to pull your head off." Very, very foolish words, man. What a piece of work is a man. Yarn is the best way to find video clips by quote. Stop saying that, Withnail! His sister give him the idea. And as Presuming Ed here has so consistently pointed out, we have failed to paint it black. We are multimillionaires. Marwood: An expert on bulls you are not! Withnail: I assure you I'm not, officer. Oh, Oxford Marwood: Yes, you are! You lead him astray. Marwood: [Contemplating how to kill a chicken for supper] It's got dreadful beady eyes, they stare at you. I'm not going to understudy anybody. I'm good looking. Have you had any training in the martial arts? There is, youll agree, a certain je ne sais quoi oh so very special about a firm, young carrot.. And for once Im inclined to believe that Withnail is right. He went to the other place, Monty. Opened the oven door and it was in there looking at me. Withnail: Marwood: So he looks at the Coalman and says, "What's all this? Easy for you to say, luvvie, you've had an audition. He's building the prototype now. Ah! Do you grow? Withnail: I've gone and fucked my brain! The school in fiction Poetry. Danny's here. Let go before it's too late or hang on and keep getting higher, posing the question: how long can you keep a grip on the rope? There are are things in there; there's a teabag growing! I think there may be something living in there, I think there may be something alive. As a youth, I used to weep in butchers' shops! Marwood: My thumbs have gone weird! Time change. Imagine getting into a fight with the f***er! The only people he converses with are his clients, and occasionally the police. DRIVE WITH EXTREME CARE"] How can it be so cold in here? It's impossible to use 12 papers on one joint. Well, it's not my fault if the system doesn't work! What are we supposed to do with that? For reasons I can't really discuss with you. Withnail: *Arrrgh*! I might come and see you lads in the week. We want the finest wines available to humanity. Marwood: Stop saying that, Withnail, of course he's the f***ing farmer! Withnail: Oh no, we'd be sucked into his trap! Probably on a tenner a day, and I know what for! Rubbish. When I come in, I seen one the size of a fucking dog. My heart's beating like a fucked clock! 2023. Chin-chin. You need working on, boy! The sky's beginning to bruise, night must fall and we shall be forced to camp. Lets take a look at the following list and find out the best Withnail and I quotes. He's lent us his cottage. They're selling hippie wigs in Woolworth's, man. Sherry? No, nor woman neither nor woman neither. Withnail: Sons are the anchors of a mother's life. Marwood: You know what we should do? Listen, I pay you 10 percent to do that. 2 quotes have been tagged as withnail-i: Bruce Robinson: 'We've gone on holiday by mistake' and Bruce Robinson: 'Here. It's the only solution to this intense cold. "Curse of the Superman. Withnail: Two quid? Withnail: We've gone on holiday by mistake. You want me to call whatshisname and ask him about his house? Yes, we'll buy this place and we'll install a fucking jukebox in here and liven all you stiffs up a bit! Danny: I can never touch meat until it's cooked. Danny: Monty: Uncle Monty: Here hare here here hare here! Oh, Baudelaire. Marwood: There's a man over there that doesn't like the perfume, the big one. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Withnail: Tactical necessity. Withnail: Maybe he's written this in some moment of drunken sincerity! Withnail: [whispering] He's going into your room. [getting up at the same time] Come on lads, let's get home. One of us has got to stay on guard. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight. I often wonder where Norman is now. What happened to my cigar commercial? The bastard's about to run at me! 13 million Londoners have to wake up to this. Marwood: I happened to be looking for a suit for the Coalman two weeks ago. [cockily] I mean to have you, even if it must be burglary! Press J to jump to the feed. I'm in the middle of a bloody overdose! Marwood: [he swerves dangerously through the motorway traffic]. Of course he's the fucking farmer! Now, look, you. Give it a chance. You wouldn't spike me, you're too mean. But old now, old. What are you talking about, Danny? We can't go on like this. Irishman: He says he won't come in for lunch without an apology. Listen, I don't know what my f acquaintance did to upset you but it's nothing to do with me. Peter Marwood (I): Even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day. And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of *dust*? [calmly] I happen to think the cauliflower more beautiful than the rose. Prostitutes for the bees. Sulking up the hill. Anyway, I loathe those Russian plays. Monty: I don't advise a haircut, man. Withnail and I Quotes. I don't want to hear it. [leaning out the car window] We mean no harm! You been away? Monty: [Withnail picks up a bottle of lighter fluid]. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. This was more like a long white hat. That's what you say. These pheasants are for my pot. Please explain the joke from Withnail and I : ExplainTheJoke It's trying to get itself in with you, it's trying for even more advantage! ""Here. Little tarts, they love it! "Here. What happened to my agent? We forgot to bring our Wellingtons. Here was a man with 3/4 of an inch of brain who'd taken a dislike to me. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into you brain! This doesn't go down at all well. Danny: An old woman with a clunky hearing aid pinned to her apron opens the door, she still doesn't answer. What's going on? I've already put two shilling pieces in. Richard E. Grant Is Making Self-Isolation Fun With Classic 'Withnail www.bbcamerica.com. Monty: Especially that pimp! Marwood: YARN | "Here hare, here." | Withnail & I (1987) | Video clips by quotes Why doesn't he retire? If The Crow and Crown ever had life it was dead now. I fail to see my family's of any interest to you. Marwood puts his hand on Withnail's shoulder]. Look at my tongue, it's wearing a yellow sock.